16.2.14

A dose of grace

If you really knew me, you'd know that words are so important to me. My primary love language (found in the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman) is words of affirmation. If you want me to know just how much you love/appreciate/admire/respect etc. me, just TELL me.

Recently I've been thinking a lot about grace. Being a new, first time mom, I've received quite a bit of advice & suggestions. All too often my response is defensive, as if I'm coming under personal attack by someone sharing their experience or thoughts. Poor, well meaning family, friends & strangers too often receive a snarky reply much to my embarrassment.

The truth is, I'm insecure. After spending 24 hours a day with my sweet baby girl, I like to think I know her pretty well. When I receive unsolicited advice, unfortunately I take it as judgement on how I parent & I respond with claws bared. Really what I need is a healthy dose of grace & to extend it to those around me.

I'm wondering if that's the problem with social media these days. I feel as though my news feeds are often full of articles justifying opinions, followed by comments for & against said articles. Grace is absent as conversations appear to become very "us against them." What happened to agreeing to disagree?

I tend to be an idealist & as such a definite optimist. Ages ago I made a choice to use social media for positive posts only. I'm sure there have been a moment or two that I've shared frustration or have pushed my opinion, although this is something I try hard to avoid.

On top of this position of optimism, I'm choosing to take a position of grace (although I need some practice). Rather than responding defensively, I will take a deep breath, smile & say thank you. AND, I will (attempt) to keep my unsolicited advice to myself. When someone disagrees with me, I will choose at times to agree to disagree, realizing that not every hill is one to die on.

Yes, realizing that I need grace, I choose to show grace.

1 comment:

David Harder said...

Good thoughts Katherine! I read the persona's of your parents in this. They did a fantastic job!